Roommates are kind of like bidets. When you first try them out, they seem kind of fun and luxurious but after a while they are kind of painful and almost annoying. I don’t mean to say that all roommates are bad; I just mean that like anything, they have their pros and cons. This isn’t limited to roommates in a 4×4 college dorm room either – this goes for boyfriends, girlfriends, “just” friends, husbands, wives and especially that complete stranger you met on Craigslist.
Now, lets start with the enticing part. Having a roommate is like having a backup plan for every Friday night. It doesn’t feel as pathetic watching re-runs of Full House while eating microwave-warmed queso if you have a partner in crime, right? Right, but there are other things to consider. No matter whom you live with, there are some things that may come up once you are no longer flying solo:
The toilet seat: Everybody has heard about the age-old fight regarding who left the toilet seat up. Well, if you’re living with a man, this becomes a reality. Nothing will make your cheeks redder than unexpectedly dipping into toilet water during a 3 AM trip to the bathroom.
Toilet paper: This small piece of everyday life can find it’s way into arguments more frequently than you might think. First of all, there is an issue of replacing a roll after the last one is through. If you and your roommate have varying views on whose responsibility this is (i.e. the person who used it last, or the person who needs toilet paper next), it can be a huge pain in the you-know-what.
Beyond that, there is the issue of which way the toilet paper goes on the roll. If you’ve never lived with a roommate, then you might not know your opinion – but as soon as you see it done wrong, you will feel strongly about whether you are an “over” or “under” person.
Privacy: Unless you’re comfortable having your roommate know exactly what you are doing every time you use the restroom, there is always a little disappointment in taking care of business with a roommate. I mean, we can all pull the age-old turn all the faucets and shower on trick…but, come on.
Snacks: Unless you are stingier than the average Dorito eater, you are probably going to be sharing snacks with your roommate. This is awesome when you are too lazy to go to the grocery store and can mooch off of their productive nature by means of chips and dip. This is not so awesome when you reach into the pantry after work for your much daydreamed about fill of chocolate covered pretzels only to find that your roommate has finished them off.
Dishes: When you move in with someone, you will never feel like being tidy on the same occasion. It is seemingly a law of the universe. When one person is feeling particularly piggish, the other will be channeling the spic and span version of himself or herself. That being said, you will find few things more aggravating (or gross) than cleaning up somebody else’s dishware. And without a doubt after you get the sink sparkling and the dishrags displayed “just so”, your roomie will delicately set a plate with their sludgy uneaten dinner (think beef nachos or pasta) right over your hard work.
Laundry Issues: When you have a roommate they almost always want to do their laundry right after you finish, which means having to face your crap and fold it like a real adult instead of leaving it sitting idly in the dryer until you run out of underwear.
Decoration Issues: When you live alone, if you want to have Twilight propaganda plastered everywhere, you can eat your heart out. When you have a roommate, you have to find a way to make your styles mesh in common areas and/or convince them that Twilight is modern sophistication at its finest.
Clothing Issues: When you have a roommate, in most cases, pants become a necessity (insert groans here).
All in all, having a roommate – be it the love of your life, a long-time friend or a new appearance in your life, requires some adjustments. However, don’t let this post turn you into the next spinner with 74 cats. Roommates are great for a lot of things, too – i.e. not facing spiders alone, a movie night partner on a whim, having somebody who can’t escape listening to your problems, expenses split in half…the list goes on.
All I am trying to say is that if there is a time period in your life when you find yourself living alone…don’t you dare mope! Take your pants off, forget about your laundry, eat your favorite snacks and get all of your #2s out of the way…you’ll thank me later.